Random Post #2
I currently am sitting in bed eating dulce de leche cookies and watching Disney's Coco. While I am not a fan of the recent Disney flicks, I genuinely like "Coco" so far. It made me laugh! It reminded me of hispanic traditions and what it was life was like growing up; for example, when the grandmother asked if he wanted more tamales and she got mad and insisted on giving more. It made me laugh because it's a sign of gratitude and good manners to accept the food of others.
**fell asleep while typing***
Today is a new day. I heard back in terms of setting up informationals with higher ups within the company. I would love to hear what others say as other's say in terms of this but I feel like HR people are very hush hush and not likely to help. They always say they are there to help but I find other wise. I haven't had time to do this online interview and it's been frustrating me. I emailed to ask if I could just write my answers but it was no. I was very much interested in interviewing a correspondent and learning more about the behind the scenes life and day to day responsibilities rather than the glitz and glamour we see on TV. I also wanted to do a production internship and be on set. I just feel so stuck and frustrated I kind of just feel like I need some space and isolation from people. Sometimes I wish I had my parents to go to for advise and guidance on everything. It definitely feels bigger than what it is when it's just you yourself handling things. I appreciate my boyfriend for being there for me thought but it'd be different if i could just have a parent care and be there. The more I am in my own head and speak/act before I think I feel like I'm becoming more and more like them and I hate that. They say you have a choice on wether to be like your parents and allow history to repeat itself but it's funny how sometimes they end up repeating without choice. I try to be cognizant of it. As I move on and forward in life, I feel like it's a void that's getting bigger and bigger. Like they're missing out on these milestones. It's actually rather sad because it's like they're dead in a way. I wish things were different but we don't really have a say in the conditions we are born in. I always feel bad for expressing these thoughts as others have it far worse.
**fell asleep while typing***
Today is a new day. I heard back in terms of setting up informationals with higher ups within the company. I would love to hear what others say as other's say in terms of this but I feel like HR people are very hush hush and not likely to help. They always say they are there to help but I find other wise. I haven't had time to do this online interview and it's been frustrating me. I emailed to ask if I could just write my answers but it was no. I was very much interested in interviewing a correspondent and learning more about the behind the scenes life and day to day responsibilities rather than the glitz and glamour we see on TV. I also wanted to do a production internship and be on set. I just feel so stuck and frustrated I kind of just feel like I need some space and isolation from people. Sometimes I wish I had my parents to go to for advise and guidance on everything. It definitely feels bigger than what it is when it's just you yourself handling things. I appreciate my boyfriend for being there for me thought but it'd be different if i could just have a parent care and be there. The more I am in my own head and speak/act before I think I feel like I'm becoming more and more like them and I hate that. They say you have a choice on wether to be like your parents and allow history to repeat itself but it's funny how sometimes they end up repeating without choice. I try to be cognizant of it. As I move on and forward in life, I feel like it's a void that's getting bigger and bigger. Like they're missing out on these milestones. It's actually rather sad because it's like they're dead in a way. I wish things were different but we don't really have a say in the conditions we are born in. I always feel bad for expressing these thoughts as others have it far worse.
I agree that it is really very hard to think and make decisions on your own without parents' guiding. Sometimes, it is not they don't want to help but they cannot help. I think the best way to get yourself out of it is to slow down. I felt the same way last semester, but after taking a long relaxing break this summer, I became better. Wish that could help. Also, I would like to talk with you if you want. : )
ReplyDeleteThis resonated with me. My parents and I differ on so many levels and as I am dating a trans man they don't accept either of us. BUT I have found that talking about it has helped me differentiate between people that want to listen and help versus people that don't. Its helped me connect with new people and (surprisingly) gain a bit of understanding for my parents' perspective. I hope you will continue to share your struggles!
ReplyDeleteI feel as if I've ran into a small bump in the road recently too. I agree that it can be very frustrating and hard, since you may not know what to do next. In my case, I kept to myself a lot and tried not to tell others about my struggles. However, I came to realize that talking it out is the best thing to do. It's important to let it out sometimes by talking with someone else.
ReplyDeleteMaking decisions on your own is something very difficult I use to consult my parents on most decisions but since I have been in college I have tired to do things more my own way. While things can get tough at times I try to stick with it and see what I can do on my own. However if something important would come up I would ask their opinion.
ReplyDeleteUsually people tend to repreat what they grew up with. Like the saying "like father, like son," people act like their parents unconsciously. Most people don't even notice, but if you want to change that it is good that you acknowledge this and act on it. I too feel like I act like my mom sometimes (shuttign my brain off), but the first step to change is realizing there is something to change.
ReplyDeleteI realized several years ago that same thing was happening to me, and I tried to fight it. Once I took a step back and looked at it though I realized I was fighting a stupid fight over a behavior that makes me a better person.
ReplyDeleteBeing the only parent in this class I can tell you it isn't easy for us. It isn't always clear when to let your children branch out on their own and make their own mistakes without interfering. I had my son at a really young age, so I kind of get it still, but at the same time there are times when I get the proverbial cold shoulder for just giving advice. And of course there are cultural differences. Older Latino's have a difficult time connecting because things are so different from the kind of guidance they needed, and it can be scary to not feel like the advice you have to give, as a parent, is no longer useful.
ReplyDeleteI LOVED CoCo! I thought it was so well done. There is nothing better than sitting in bed with dessert and watching a good movie. On the second part of your post, I totally get what you mean about trying not to become your parents. There are things that we just have to learn for ourselves from our own experiences.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your perspective. Always be yourself, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. If you are true to yourself, everything else will fall into place!
ReplyDelete